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10 Lessons Learned
By mstrohm | August 4, 2011
My house has been alive with my 2 ½ and a 1 ½ year old granddaughters for the last week. I honestly forgot what the constant motion and constant vigilance was like!
I learned (or re-learned) 10 things:
#1 – Never leave sharp knives in the dishwasher where little ones can get them. NEVER!
#2 – Don’t reason with a 2 ½ year old, no matter how good your point may be. She does not need to know why lightening is dangerous and therefore finishing the walk is unwise, just hold her hand tight, turn around and walk home. Besides, your wife and daughter will not understand when you bring her in screaming because of a loud nearby thunder boom.
#3 –The quote “ An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure” is all wrong when it comes to two little ones. It really should be: “An ounce of prevention is worth a ton of cure.” Especially when it comes to setting up the training potty. Don’t wash it and think you will assemble it at a later date! Do it right away. Finding human waste on your floor just below the potty is very, very distressing.
#4 – If a 2 ½ year old says “no, I don’t like it” assume she has no idea what she is talking about, especially if you were assigned to share your steak with her. If she changes her mind and decides she really loves steak just as you eat the last bite, your family will look at you with disgust assuming you were opportunistic and will not understand when you tell them “but she said…”
#5 – Don’t pity yourself and ask “Why do I have to vacuum the rug every day?” All mothers will assume you do not have a deep and abiding love for the two little monsters that are causing all the dirt.
#6 – If you are taking a 2 ½ year old on a 10 minute walk to the park, remember to have her go to the bathroom before you leave unless you like getting there and turning around.
#7 – Never do anything in front of little ones that you don’t want them to mimic. This is especially true when it comes to splashing others in the face at the pool. When you tell the little ones to stop they will laugh.
#8 – If your daughter tells you her 1 ½ year old daughter has an allergy to corn, and you are assigned to shuck corn with the 1 ½ year old as a helper, don’t quiet her by giving her an ear to nibble. When your daughter asks what you are doing, don’t try to be funny by saying “don’t worry, corn was not listed in the ingredients.” It is likely she won’t laugh.
#9 – Don’t assume your TV is safe just because you placed your coffee table in front as a protective barrier. 2 ½ year olds can throw cups a great distance! If you do have a cup full of apple juice hit your TV and splash down the front – don’t despair. Dry it, put a fan on it and it should be fine, mine was!
#10 – Enjoy every moment you are with those little monsters. You will dearly miss them when they go!
Topics: From Mark, Parenting | 1 Comment »
August 23rd, 2011 at 5:01 am
This is hilarious! We have just been visiting my father-in-law these past two weeks with my 3 year old and 18 month old, and likely giving him a similar trip down memory lane.
Thanks for the giggle!